Bad Girl
by horsegrrl
Summary: Draco's lookin hot in the 6th year. So in order to win him over, 'Mione wants to be as bad as him.
1. Malfoylicous

"Hey Granger, are you as smart as Einstien? Cause you look like him. And you're both muggles!" Hermione heard Draco say. She turned to him. "Draco you'd better shut up or I'll put a hex on you!"  
  
The Slytherins laughed, but they didn't have time to retort because the class began.  
  
"God, Malfoy pisses me off," she muttered to Harry and Ron. They nodded quickly.   
  
But during the lesson, Hermione caught herself staring at him more than once. Is it just me, she wondered, or has 16 year-old Draco Malfoy begun to look... hotter?  
  
During the lesson, Hermione found it hard to concentrate on the lesson. Draco really WAS hot. Now he didn't wear gel, so his blonde hair hung in his face, which made him look ever more sexy. But Hermione knew it was just a fantasy. Malfoy would never consider going out with a mudblood.  
  
"Hey, Hermione, you ok?" Harry asked, snapping his fingers in her face. It was lunchtime and she really needed to snap out of it. "Yeah, Yeah. I'm fine." She shook her head a couple of times, and made herself stop thinking about how hot Malfoy was. Damn! If there was only one way for me to get him! She wondered angrily.  
  
But by nightime, she had the perfect solution. 


	2. Step one: Dress sexy

That night, Hermione dreamed about Draco. How sexy he was, how bad. Hermione Granger, the know-it-all good girl, wanted to become bad.  
  
The next night, it was Friday, the day before a Hogsmede weekend. "I really need to pick up some new books- I mean clothes," She was telling Ginny. It was early in the morning, the only time Ginny didn't have at least 10 guys hanging off her. Ginny had become quite popular, and set all the latest trends, so it was smart to go to her for fashion advice. "'Mione, not that you would be interested, but miniskirts and tube tops are in," Ginny said. She wasn't trying to be mean, she just knew that Hermione preferred the Hogwarts black robes to sexy black clothes.  
  
But this time, Hermione listened with interest. "Hey, Ginny, would you mind showing me what the sexiest clothes in Hogsmede are?" Ginny looked at her in amazement, and then smiled. "Sure, 'Mione. By day after tomorrow, you won't even recognize yourself."  
  
"I'm COLD!" Hermione wailed. Ginny laughed. "You won't be when you're surrounded by a bunch of hotties!"   
  
Hermione shivered. She felt very out of place. Suddenly Ginny posed like a model. "Do this," she ordered. Slowly Hermione posed. Her expression changed from disbelief to happiness. "Hey! I don't look that bad!" Ginny smiled. "My work here is done. Buy about ten sexy outfits, and then you're going to be able to take your pick fom what guy in Hogwarts you want." Ginny left the dressing room. Hermione grinned at herself. "Out with the old, in with the new. Draco Malfoy, here i come!"  
  
The next day, Hermione dressed in her sexiest outfit, and then wore her robe over it. "NO guy can resist me now!"  
  
She strutted down the passageways, smiling. "What are you so happy about?" Lavender asked, trying to keep Dean and Seamus off of her. "You'll see."  
  
Hermione suddenly took off her robe. Under it was a glittery black tube top, the most revealing miniskirt, and some high black boots. She removed the hood and her hair was completely straight. She strutted into the great hall, and, well, made quite a scene.  
  
"Go, Granger!" a Ravenclaw Hermione had never spoken to in her life whisteled. Suddenly, guys started clapping and whisteling. Ron and Harry's mouths were wide open.  
  
Malfoy, on the other hand, was tired and didn't look up. That is, until Crabbe's huge arm slammed into him. "Shove off, you big oaf..." he trailed off. There Granger, the mudblood was, standing with an outfit on that Britney Spears wouldn't even wear. His mouth dropped open, and he forgot to blink. Hermione *suprisingly* noticed this. He scratched his head. She winked seductively at him, and motoned for him to follow her. She left the Great Hall, and, after everyone had gone back to their meals, trailed after Hermione.  
  
"Granger I mmfff!" He said as she grabbed him and kissed him full on the lips. 


	3. Step 2: Badditude

"Whoa, what was that for?" Draco said breathlessly. Hermione smiled an evil little smile. She grabbed him and kissed him more. Draco didn't resist.  
  
They both stopped to catch their breath. "Granger, you've changed. You might be bad enough to be in our group." Hermione smiled again. "Ok, but only if Harry and Ron can come too." Draco scowled. "On one condition," he told her. "They have to become badasses like you."  
  
Hermione agreed, wanting to be together with all of her friends. "I'll go tell them."   
  
She ran off to find Harry and Ron in the hall. Harry's mouth dropped. "Hermione, what in the fuckin' hell are you wearing?" Hermione looked down and saw that she still had her slutty outfit on. She brushed that aside quickly. "Guys, Malfoy said that if we are bad enough we can join his group!" Harry and Ron looked at each other. Hermione knew that they had always wanted to be part of that group. "Well, i dunno," Ron began, but Hermione interrupted.  
  
"You know they always get the 'hottest' girls," Hermione wheedled. Ron grinned. "Sounds great! When do we start?"  
  
Hermione rushed off to Draco. "They aggreed," she said quickly. Draco grinned. "Ok, Granger. Now, go down the hall by the statue of Gregory the Smarmy. If you whisped 'I see you' then a door will appear. The password is 'I am a communist'." Hermione grinned. All her life she had wanted to be bad, and now she was getting a chance.   
  
The meetings were every night at 12:00. Most of the group were Slytherins but some were Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs. They were the only Gryffindors, except Ginny Weasley.   
  
Draco told the rest of the group that Hermione, Harry and Ron were joining. At first they objected but Draco reminded them about what Hermione was wearing.   
  
Harry, Ron and Hermione showed up for the meeting at 12:00 exactly. Even a gone-bad Hermione was organized.  
  
Draco, of course, was head of the group. "Attention!" he roared, and everyone shut up.   
  
"Everyone welcome our newest members, Weasley, Potter, and Granger!" there was snapping, like in old movies. No one wanted to make the effort to clap.  
  
"Now, Granger, I nominate you to be the head organizer. You have to organize when people bring the 'goods'." Hermione nodded, and the vote was unanimous. Hermione took the stand.  
  
"Tomorrow, Parkinson will bring the 'goods'." Pansy took the cigarette out of her mouth to complain. "What? Why me?" Hermione sighed with exasperation. "Because you can stuff your bra with it instead of tissues, no one will suspect." That seemed a good enough reason for Pansy. She shrugged and shoved the cigarette back in her mouth.  
  
It was clear now that everyone went by their last names. At first it seemed a problem for Ron and Ginny, but every one pronounced Ginny's last name 'Weezlai" so it wasn't a problem.  
  
"Now Weasley is the field trip organizer," Draco boomed. Ron decided that their first field trip would be to the Sexy Squirrel, a local bar.  
  
Cho Chang took the stand. She was the vice-president, and now had rings in every imaginable place. "Now, Potter?" she said. "Yes?" Harry asked. "Your job, is to just hang around and look good." "I can do that," Harry replied, looking happily at the circle of girls forming around him.  
  
After the meeting, Draco approached Hermione. "Granger, classes tomorrow. Keep the badditude."   
  
That's what everyone called their bad acting lifestyle. Hermione grinned. "No problem."  
  
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A/N: Like? I was just meaning to make this little fic for no reason, I had an inspiration. But then I got lots of reviews. I thank you all!  
  
Selena 


	4. Going to Class

It was Monday morning, and Hermione was getting ready. "Off with the robes, on with the bikinis," she said to Ginny, laughing. Ginny giggled and put on a coconut bra and grass skirt. "I've been begging Mum to take us to Hawaii. Maybe we'll have to jack an airplane?"  
  
Hermione wore a black leather halter top and extra tight leather pants. They stood admiring themselves for a minute, and then Ginny went to DADA and Hermione to Transfiguration.  
  
But since she had spent the extra time putting on her dark eyeliner, she was late to class. Professor McGonagall almost had a heart attack when she saw her favourite student had become such a... badass. "Miss Granger! You are 15 minutes late! And you are violating the dress code!"   
  
Hermione shrugged. "So?" she asked Mc Gonagall blankly. McGonagall gasped, and then just sighed. "Take your seat, Miss Granger." Hermione got angry. "Hey! That's 'Mione!"  
  
She looked around for Harry and Ron to sit with them. Ron's thick, red hair was spiked and he and Harry both had black leather on like 'Mione.  
  
"Not, we will start today off by learning a transferr spell-" McGonagall began, but Ron interrupted. "What in the fucking hell is a transferr spell?" he asked loudly. There was a ripple of giggling in the class, but everyone shut up quickly when they saw McGonagall's expression. Everyone, that is, except for the trio. They were clapping hands and laughing loudly.   
  
That was the last straw. "GO OUTSIDE IN THE HALL IMMEDIATELY! 100 PIONTS FROM GRYFFINDOR AND YOU ALL HAVE DETENTIONS!" The three stood up. "Whatever you say Mc-G," Harry yawned, giving her the finger. They all left happily, not having to do Transfiguration.  
  
"That was awesome!" Ron said laughing. "I feel powerful!" 'Mione laughed. "That was just the begining, the test. Now that we know we can do it, we should have no problem getting out of Herbology." They slapped hands again and waited till Herbology.  
  
"EW! No fucking way am I going to get this top dirty!" 'Mione complained to Professor Sprout, where Ron had a mysterious tropical disease and Harry had a panic attack. Ginny then broke her wrist and they were all dismissed.   
  
"It was fake!" Ginny shrieked as she threw the fake wrist aside. They all laughed and went to the meeting. 


	5. Revilo Doow

Draco had mentioned that they had an official room for meetings now, and had given everyone directions. So Harry, Ron, Ginny and Hermione made their way to the meeting room laughing their heads off.   
  
"You should have seen that expression on Colin Creevy's face! I swear to God if he stares at my tits one more time I will never flash him again!" Ginny told the group. Hermione nodded "That little nerd has liked you since... forever." Ginny laughed. "Gee, maybe I'd go with him if his teeth weren't so big, package not so small, and he wasn't such a sex perv." Meanwhile, Harry and Ron were arguing over who was hotter, Pansy Parkinson or Cho Chang.  
  
"Parkinson's a steal! She's do anything for a buck or two. The regular 1010-987 for men."   
  
"Yeah but Chang must have at least a D cup... and Parkinson could never afford implants." Life was good.  
  
When they got to the location of the meeting room, there was a portrait of a grungy old sailor. "Password?" he asked in a scratchy voice.  
  
Hermione sighed. "Fuck you." The sailor shrugged and swung away.   
  
Ginny recognized someone in the room. "KEANU REEVES!" she screeched and went over to mob Keanu. "I'm not Keanu I'm Neo!" he protested weakly. Ginny didn't hear him. Hermione walked over to where Draco was standing and gave him a big kiss on the lips. Unfortunately it wasn't Draco. "Who the hell are you?" he said. Hermione looked up. "Whoops... wrong pimp." The pimp grinned. "Well babe, anytime you need a pimp gimme a call." He handed her a business card. His name was labled: PIMP JONES. Hermione walked over to where Ron was standing and showed it to him. "That can't be his real name," Ron said in wonder. Meanwhile Hermione was staring across the room. "I know I've seen that guy somewhere," she told Ron, pointing to a strange man with dark glasses across the room. She walked up to him. "Excuse me, mister, but... I have this feeling I know you." A fortune teller was nearby. "Maybe in another life..." she said in a dreamy voice.  
  
"NO!" the man screamed. "YOU DON'T KNOW ME! I DON'T KNOW YOU! WE AIN'T NEVER SEEN EACH OTHER NOWHERE!" Hermione gasped. She had suddenly realized who it was. "Wood?" she whispered. Wood had grown long dark hair, hadn't shaven much, and spoke in a strange New York accent. "No! I am NOT Wood! I'm..." he appeared to be thinking. Seconds went by. Then minutes. A tumble weed rolled along. Then he thought of it. "I'm his twin brother, Revilo Doow!"  
  
"Wood!" Hermione shrieked.  
  
"Doow!"  
  
"Wood!"  
  
"Doow!"  
  
This went on for quite some time until Hermione finally gave in. But once he turned his back, she whispered, "Wood."  
  
In a different corner of the room, Draco was standing and talking to Pimp Jones, trying to make arrangements when suddenly Crabbe jumped on him and started humping him. "Oh, Neville! How I've longed for thee!" Crabbe shrieked in a horribly practiced voice. Draco pushed him off. "What the hell do yout hink you're doing, gay ass?" Draco shouted. Across the room, Ron had overheard. "You bitch!" Ron yelled. "I thought we had something!" He ran to Crabbe and threw a bottle of Mike's Hard Lemonade on his head. The cap rolled off. It read, 'refreshing'.  
  
Meanwhile, Ginny had succeeded in stealing all of Keanu's clothes, and she went to stash them in the closet. She opened the door and out rolled Madame Hooch. She had long hair, long nails, and long facial hair. "Thank you for saving me!" she yelled to Ginny. Ginny just shoved her back in the closet. "Wrong closet," she muttered.   
  
Harry had been smoking joints this whole time. They were all gone now. "Damn, where'd all the joints go!" he screamed. "Get the hew off mah law'n!" some cowboy named Colby told him. Harry looked down and saw he was standing on one square inch of grass. He walked away, in search of the lost joints.  
  
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Well, what do you guys think? I decided to make it more funny, some of you probably won't like it but I'm hoping more do. Oh, and I'm thinking that I should change the rating to R. Email me at famousactress12@msn.com to tell me if you think I should or not. Peace out!  
  
%*Cat*% 


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